The Common Emotions of Divorce: You Are Not Alone

Understanding the Common Emotional Factors in Divorce

As the divorce rate among Americans continues to increase, the likelihood of knowing someone going through a divorce, or going through one yourself, increases in kind. Awareness of common emotional turbulence can help us to know that we are not alone in what we are feeling, and that your attorney has seen it before. Not only are our San Diego divorce attorneys at Cage & Miles, LLP experienced in the legal process of divorce, we also have stood by our clients as they navigate the divorce process emotionally. We understand what you are feeling and can help to ease the stress where we can, through mediation or your trial, so that you can focus on healing and rebuilding your life.

Common Emotional States During and After Divorce

Men and women typically handle difficult situations differently, but they both are subject to similar emotional hardships when facing a divorce. Although the emotional timelines may not mirror each other, there are common emotions that arise across the board.

Common feelings due to marital loss include:

• Anxiety: One of the biggest parts of divorce that effects everyone involved is change. Change in household structure, living conditions, finances, time spent with children, and a general change of lifestyle are all part of divorce. With change sometimes comes anxiety, as many divorcees experience fear of the unknown as they separate from someone they have built a life with.
• Anger: Anger is to be expected in most divorces. If you have unresolved arguments that are reappearing or if you are upset with yourself for letting your marriage slip through your hands, you may be feeling angry. Anger in divorce may stem from discovery of lies or an affair. Quite often things are held in to “keep the peace” so when the anger finally surfaces during divorce, it comes out full force. It is not uncommon for spouses to “air their laundry” once they know the marriage is over.
• Depression: Sadness may overcome you on some days, and that is okay. It is to be expected when you are mourning the loss of the hope you had to live happily ever after. If you feel like the cloud does not lift for several days or weeks, it may be helpful to speak with your physician about possible depression, so that you can manage it early and efficiently.
• Jealousy: Not only may you experience jealousy if your ex was having an affair, but you may also feel jealousy of how they appear to be handling the divorce, their seemingly great new relationship, or how your children are interacting with them.

Although this is just a short list of common emotional states, you may be experiencing a rollercoaster of emotions, feeling joy and freedom one day and sadness the next. Give yourself a break and don’t beat yourself up by comparing how you are coping with your ex. Remember that men and women handle divorce differently, and that is okay.

We’re Here to Help

If a divorce is eminent in your life, and you are unsure of what to do, turn to our team of San Diego divorce lawyers. We have the experience and understanding that you need in this difficult time and we can help you protect your children, finances and your future. Let us take some of the stress of divorce off your shoulders, call our team today.

Contact us for a free divorce consultation.